Nothing truly prepares you for the rigors of real-world business ownership.  Business school has its place, but it won’t teach you how to fire someone without losing sleep.   Or what to do when your two most important employees are conspiring against each other.

This is a collection of unfiltered leadership lessons from the trenches.  Some are practical. Some are mindset shifts. All are real.

Let’s skip the theory. Here’s the real curriculum: 21 quick lessons.

1. Your employees are people first

Find out something about your employees’ personal lives and ask them sincerely about it on a regular basis – foster a human connection whilst keeping it professional.

This shows that you value them as a person, as much as you value them as an employee. They are people first, and workers second…. Your employees will care about your business, only if they know you care about them as a person.

2. Actions speak louder than words

Your behaviour as a leader has more influence on your team, than your words. Your behaviour provides the stories that people will tell about you. What you say, often gets forgotten… or sometimes, just not heard. What they see you do, is remembered.

3. Why, not just what

Explain to your staff why something is important, not just what they need to do.  People will be more invested and do things more thoroughly when they know why it’s important.

4. Encourage your employees to develop solutions

Once you’ve listened carefully to an employee’s problem, ask them to tell you what they think could fix it, always ask whether there are any other possible solutions that should also be considered.

Often, they are the best person to come up with a solution. After all, it’s the person who experiences the consequences that is best placed to make the decision.

5. Your staff are more important than your customers

Employees are the source of all value creation in business. The most important part of your role as a leader is supporting your team.   Doing your own ‘work’ is secondary to providing your team with everything they need to be successful.  

Have you ever tried standing on a chair, and lifting someone up off the ground? Not easy. Most times they just pull you down. If you want to lift someone up, you need to get under them and support them. This applies to your employees. Support them and watch what happens to your business.

6. Acknowledge good deeds

Magic words, create magic. Verbally acknowledge good deeds from your people – all the time. Recognition should occur as closely to the performance of the action as possible. Just because you’re aware of something ‘good’, doesn’t mean that they know it. Catch your employees doing something right – and then tell them about it.

FACT: your employees are not only motivated by money, but they will also be motivated by a thank you, and genuine acknowledgement from their boss.

7. Let people think for themselves

Who controls a conversation? The one asking the questions.

Every time you provide an answer to an employee’s question, when you could have asked a question instead, you have removed their need to think for themselves.  

Gradually they will become better equipped to answer their own question next time and may not even need to ask.

"It is not the answer that enlightens, but the question."  Eugen Ionesco

Taking things further, why not make yourself unavailable for periods throughout the week.  Work from home, or just not be contactable. You’re not helping your staff by always being there for them, answering their questions. Let them think for themselves.

8. Robotic leaders

If you want your business to succeed and grow, but don’t want to commit to becoming a better leader of people, then you’d better hope those experiments with AI robots work out…

Speak to your people regularly, and ask them questions about how they’re feeling

• How do they feel about their job, their colleagues, their work environment? 

• What’s their favourite part of their job?

• What frustrates them?

9. Your success is in direct relation to the number of difficult conversations you’re willing to have

None of us enjoy having difficult conversations with our employees.  They’re always uncomfortable, so we often make up excuses, and reasons for not having them.  However, having the courage, and accepting discomfort means that your business will be easier to manage in the long run.  Avoid them, and you’ll always be frustrated in your business.   Nothing can change, until the unspoken is said. The key to great culture is creating a never-ending conversation about the “rules of the game”, so that everyone is clear on exactly how to act, how to communicate, and how to treat each other.

What you push down doesn’t just vanish. It festers and wields quiet power over your thoughts and actions. Ask yourself - what issue in your business needs to be addressed, that isn’t currently being addressed?

10. Too many buts

When you say something as a business owner, and then follow it with a ‘but’, it creates a number of negative connotations with your staff. 

“You did a good job on that, BUT…”

“That’s ok, BUT…

“Next time I’ll help you with that, BUT…”

Try to avoid using BUT in your conversations with your employees and try using the word “AND” instead.  It will keep them more open minded to your message.

11. Move FAST on people issues  

If you ignore them, or turn a blind eye, or justify why you haven’t taken action, bad things will eventually happen, and you’ll be in for more pain down the track.  Deal with it as soon as you’re aware of it.  And this includes removing an employee who is not fitting into your culture.  You’ll be so glad you did.

12. Stop telling your employees how busy and stressed you are

They have their own ‘stuff’ to deal with.  Your family and friends are the best people to debrief with regarding your stress levels. Find other ways to deal with your stress levels at work.   Telling your employees, who might be stressed and in survival-mode themselves, doesn’t help you or your business.

13. What type of leader do you want to be?

Think about the best manager you’ve ever had.    Why did you enjoy working under them?  What qualities did they have?  How did they treat their staff?   Then think about whether you would like to be managed by you. Decide what type of manager you want to become and adopt a style and mindset that aligns.  

14. Are you the roadblock?

“So much of what we call management consists of making it difficult for people to work.”  Peter Drucker.

Think about it – what do you do that gets in the way of your people doing their work?

15. Agreement versus commitment

Just because you feel an employee has agreed to something, it doesn’t mean they are committed.   When in meetings or discussions with an employee, look for commitment, not just a nodding of the head.   Committed people take action, with a lot more vigour towards the outcome.

Have you heard the expression, ‘Everyone nodded, nobody agreed…’?

16. Do you have a feedback loop?

Feedback is arguably a business owner’s greatest gifts – even when it’s not accurate!   Set up a system in your business where people can give you feedback on how things are going, how they are feeling, and possible ideas to improve things.  

And don’t be afraid to go out of your way to ask an employee how they’re doing each day in their job.   And when they offer something up, always listen respectfully, and thank them.

17. Stop interrupting your people

Think about when you get most of your work done.  Often, it’s first thing in the morning, or later at home.  This is because there are no interruptions.   Consider this when you next go to one of your employees with a question.  Or phone them about something unimportant.  Q.  Do you really need to stop them doing what they’re doing right now?  You often have other options.  If you want your people to focus, and do their work, don’t interrupt them unnecessarily.  

18. Don’t micro-manage

The best leaders don’t tell people how to do things, with step-by-step instructions. Instead they explain what has to be achieved (the end goal), and why. Think about what you need to do as a leader to ensure that your people have what it takes to figure out how to do it and then provide the freedom to actually do it. When people start thinking for themselves, their IQ often doubles! Give people space, and they excel. 

19. How do you handle poor performance in your business?

Do you get angry? Stressed? Vocal? Do you storm off? Or go into yourself, and avoid that person? Your role is to give your people what they need to perform, not what you need to release. What your people don’t need is to feel scared or punished, which is how we make them feel when we ‘hold them accountable’ in anger. In the moment, take a breath. Think about what they’re going through, and what they need to do to achieve a better outcome next time?

20. Take responsibility for all mistakes in your business

This might sound harsh, but business ownership is so much easier when you take responsibility.  Making mistakes is inevitable, but learning from them is optional.  Keep blaming others, and you’re unlikely to grow as a business owner. 

Play above the Line = Ownership, Accountability, Responsibility

Play below the Line = Blame, Excuses, Denial

21. You can’t be mates with your employees. FULL STOP.

This doesn’t mean that you’re not supportive and respectful of your employees. Of course you should be. Just not close personal buddies.  It’s been tried time and time again, and almost every time it failed. You might think you’re the exception, and that your situation is somehow different, and it will work to have your mate as an employee. Truth is, when the lines are blurred, it always ends badly.